The Sex Trap, Balancing Hormonal Agents and the BrainAs I had my early morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column caught my eye. A reader composed in with a dating predicament and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to get love, and males use love to obtain sex." This is a fantastic summation of the "Sex Trap."
The Sex Trap is similar to the Love Trap, where singles analyze good sex as love. However those who fall into the Sex Trap go even farther due to the fact that for these singles, having sex brings immense meaning and effects.
Songs fall under the Sex Trap in one (or both) of 2 methods:
A.they think sex is a necessary test of compatibility, (if the sex is good then the relationship will be good also).
B.more frequently, all awareness goes out the window, and one or both formerly level-headed singles consider themselves a dedicated couple as quickly as they have sex.
So, instead of taking a look at whether this other person might be a match on levels other than physical tourist attraction-- such as long-lasting requirements, needs, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.
No doubt, it can be challenging to correspond with truth when all those hormones are running wild. Our body reacts to somebody we are brought in to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural state of mind enhancers), and testosterone ( boosts libido), which makes the opportunity to have sex with someone we are brought in to very difficult to withstand. Then, after orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce emotions), that makes us feel extremely close to and bonded with our sex partner.
These chemical reactions are uncontrolled and strong , causing powerful sensations of destination, enjoyment, wellness, nearness, and love .
However when issues emerge, those who fall under the Sex Trap often rationalize by believing, "Well, we've got problems, but the sex is terrific!" They most likely wouldn't admit it, but they focus on physical intimacy and relate to the rest as optional. Their primary hunting tools are sexual attraction and physical compatibility.
Barry North, an RCI coach who works primarily with gay males, says that a number of his customers have fallen under the Sex Trap.
" For gay guys particularly in city areas, sex is easily offered, and that in itself is a trap," North states. Why waste your time if the sex isn't really going to be good?".
Nevertheless, North includes, "I believe this is a 'guy' thing instead of a 'gay' thing.".
I do wish to mention that chemistry is very important. Learn More Here Yet, chemistry is a offered that we can't control in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it needs to be there for the collaboration to work. If not there, we can't "make" chemistry take place, though in some cases it can grow with time.
When the hormone-induced intoxication uses off and truth hits, Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry risk relationship failure.
To avoid the Sex Trap, you need to stabilize your heart (and hormones) with your head. This indicates integrating chemistry with typical sense. While good sex is essential for a sustainable relationship, you have to make your partner choices by paying complete focus on your vision, worths, requirements, and goals -- while feeling all those interesting sparks!